Ben Rodgers: My Internet Identity

REUBEN WILLIAMS: WHAT YOU MISSED (1/16/10)

If you weren’t at the Reuben Williams show on Saturday, you missed:

1st Half: (Audience suggestion: Gay Dinosaurs From New Jersey)

-A couple who see a “sex slash marriage” counselor because they are unable to remember when they have sex

-A Power Outage at a New Jersey theme park causes New Jersey Men to roam free. Their vision is based on movement.

-The hottest guy at Sears seduces female co-workers by texting them, “Come to my place.” They watch some of his DVDs, which are just reenactments of movies his two friends make, then have sex.

- A scientist who believes Dinosaurs were once dancers, changes a museum display while the curator is at a water park.

2nd Half: (Audience Suggestion: Dracula has Herpes)

- Two Halloween Adventure employees try to make sales. The younger employee, Brando is pushing ‘Sexy’ costumes hard. Toby from the magic department continually interrupts sales with his increasingly amazing tricks. Several customers arrive including a man who thinks he is a vampire, and a woman who wants a sexy cop outfit, but gets realistic police gear. Another customer, John Reynolds, needs to buy a mask because he just murdered someone at a post office.

Make reservations for next week now!

Mustache Machine

There is a mustache machine at the Union Square regal.

It gives out runny booger stickers.

Looked better on Matt Damon.